On this episode, Chuck Gaidica was joined by Sydney Lipsey, Manager of Behavioral Health Strategy and Planning for Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan. Together, they discussed ways to overcome perfectionism.
Focusing on perfectionism over progress can have real effects on mental health and well-being. Chuck Gaidica reminded listeners of a Voltaire quote; “perfect is the enemy of good.” Anything less than perfection can feel like a failure to some people. If we are constantly seeing imperfections as unacceptable, it can be a constant uphill battle mentally.
Signs of perfectionism
How can you know when you are being a perfectionist? There are obvious signs like seeking perfection in all areas of your life or demanding that of yourself, but there are less obvious signs as well. One sign is “being all or nothing with something,” according to Sidney Lipsey. “You're all in, or you really don't want anything to do with it. And I think this one makes sense to me because if you're all in, you're going to try to make it perfect, but if you can't, then it's like ‘why even try?’”
Other signs include being very critical of yourself and others, being a procrastinator, feeling defensive when getting feedback and craving approval. These signs may be more apparent in settings that require close attention to detail such as accounting or engineering. Effects of perfectionism on mental health and overall well-being
There can be a fine line between having high standards for yourself and experiencing perfectionism. Perfectionism can affect you negatively emotionally and mentally. If you notice signs of perfectionism in your daily life, you may notice you experience some of the effects of perfectionism as well. Perfectionism can cause increased stress, according to Lipsey. “It can also lead to burnout, anxiety, depression,” Lipsey said. “It can also lead to some low self-esteem, lots of frustration, and those can spill over into other areas of your life too.” If you set the bar at perfect, you will constantly be falling short of it and that can negatively affect your mental and emotional health.
How to overcome perfectionism
There are a few ways to mitigate perfectionism. The first is to try to identify the root cause behind the drive for perfection. It could be a desire to impress or for approval or a fear of failure. The second is to focus on the result of doing things well. How does your good work affect coworkers, customers or clients, or your family and the people around you? If you place the focus of your work on being positive and helpful for others, it can help to shake perfectionism. You can also check in with your boss or colleagues. Ask them how things are going, ask if you are doing too much nitpicking or if there is anything you are focusing on too much.
If you are feeling increased stress and anxiety, are losing sleep or your appetite because of perfectionism, it’s something you need to address. Try focusing on gratitude for your past successes and reminding yourself of how capable you are. Mindfulness and deep breathing techniques to calm yourself down and reduce stress can help. You can also use cognitive behavioral therapy to address perfectionism, which can shift the harmful thought patterns involved in perfectionism to more productive ways of thought.
Listen to the podcast, How to Overcome Perfectionism, to hear the entire conversation. A Healthier Michigan Podcast is brought to you by Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan.
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